an indian woman in a bar

It was a night some time ago, when a trip off the rez took Chay to work in a far off city and staying in a motel he went to find a place where there was some music.


There was a place downstairs, the motel had a happy hour and some of the people who were there with him were in the lounge; saw them and went over. Some of them had already started drinking earlier in the day and were getting rowdy and loud so he left the place and down on Central.

There a place that played Blues music, so he went in and found a spot in the corner when he saw her.

Halloween had come and the night had fallen early, the little kids dressed as ghouls, goblins and witches were out. It was at the mutual help housing area in Fort Defiance called Rio Puerco, where apartments and houses were all crowded together and many of the kids from the community and outlying areas like Red Lake, Blue Canyon, Coalmine Road and Hunters Point had come into do some trick or treating. It was a good night for it, the night air was cool, not too cold and there were all kinds of kids out.

Chay had taken his daughter and son out and were finishing up walking back toward where they lived there, when he ran into one of his co-workers from work. She was out with her little girls and at times since they worked together for a while n the same place they would talk about their families. She was Pueblo, from Santa Clara and was known as quite the pretty one and that got her noticed and she was moved to the front office to work for one of the tribal department heads.

They were headed in different directions when they saw each other. They had gotten along well after three years in the same office but hadn’t seen each other because of work in different departments for some time.

How’s is going there Ms. M?

Hey, Hi…just out with my girls….she looked good.

Their kids ran to the doors around the circle where they were standing talking, Chay and Ms. M.

How’s your old man?

He’s working tonight; he’s got graveyard shift at the mine, so he’s gone in early.

Oh, so you are the lucky one…she smiled at that.

So do you still want run away with me? …her hands were full, her 4 yr old was pulling on her…Mom let’s go…we have to go…

She said, you want me to wash your dirty underwear?

Sure, holes and all….they talked for a while and made their way together to the nest block, where they found a spot in the middle of the street and the kids hit this circle of houses about seven in all and they talked and kidded with one another. Pretty soon it was time to head home and so they said, Good night, but there was slowness in their leaving the spot where they stood, but Halloween treats took over and so they headed off on their different treks…

It had been a year or so since he had seen her, but in the mean time, her little girl who was 8 had been playing outside near where they lived, and been run over and was gone. He had heard about it and wanted to drop by and see Ms. M. but she wasn’t working there anymore. She had left the place. He heard stories about her…..that she was often seen sitting at the graveyard near her daughter’s grave and talking to her even though she was gone….people started to talk about her and then he didn’t hear anything about her anymore.

Chay sat down and listened to the music and from across the room could see that there was this Indan woman sitting at a table alone, her back toward him…she looked familiar to him in a way….

He sat there and drank his drink, and she turned toward the band and it was her….she looked like she had been drinking for a while…she was still the same but really worn, the shine was gone. He walked over to the table she was at and sat down….she looked at him…but she was in a different place…she looked passed him….recognized him and said his name…but nothing more…she took another drink and said…buy me a drink…..

In the days of their working together their time together was at work, they were married and they knew it….they got along well together, but he wondered sometimes about her and wondered about her husband who liked to step out on her, but he didn’t think she knew about it and never mentioned it. He sometimes thought about how it would be to know her…to go home to her…to make her children his…but there are things that remain unsaid, but sometimes the slightest gaze, or unexpected touch being together all the time working together was sometimes more than just a touch, but they knew themselves and let it go….so it goes sometimes, but he wondered about it…..

He thought about her drink, it wasn’t a good idea…but she asked again in a low voice…Chay, can you buy me a drink?

What are you doing here, I mean I didn’t expect to see you here….

She looked at with bloodshot eyes….my husband left me, so I moved here…she looked like she hadn’t changed her clothes for days, her hair was combed but it needed something more….

It was near Two Gray Hills, when he was out herding sheep with is Grandpa that they walked from Two Gray Hills over the Red Rocks to the South along the hogback to a spring that was in the rocks. Chay, his name in Navajo is a way saying Grandpa, it was a name used in referring older men, who with age had lived a long life. It was those who men who had way of talking to you so that you could understand some things about life. His Shimasani-Grandmother was the same way, and this day, they talked about red sash belts that were worn by women and girls during sings, and special occasions. They were used to wrap around the waist of women and used during Kinaaldi, and during child birth.

The colors of it are red, with white, stripes of green and a little black. As they sat down, the old man talked about how difficult life is, and that men have to be able to the hard things of life. He spoke of women as being the ones to have a softness like gentle rain, that they raise the children, caring for them, and looking after them from the time they are born, so that each child born is tied to his mother and the sash belt represents that as the red is for strife, blood and hard work, the pain of bearing children, raising them, seeing them grow, and caring for them in sickness. He explained the use of the belt in certain ways during sings, and the wrapping of it. He said some look at it like just a cloth but it represent much more, and in women you have to understand that you were a part of them, that you were formed in them, they carried you, and you were born and so you are tied to womanhood forever.

He spoke about the stories of the Twin Heroes, and the story of how one young man layed down with girl he had met at a sing at her Hogan and that during the night he was overcome with a sickness, a feeling he couldn’t control because he was so close to her. He said you don’t understand this sickness but some day it will come to you and you will find that there some who will chase this feeling all day, looking for it whenever they got out and see women. Chay remembered looking at him like he was crazy, because he didn’t understand what kind of sickness that could be.

He related the story of the young man long ago, and that he stayed all night with the woman, he woke up and found that he had been with a young girl that night but woke up with an old hag, and that she was his wife…so he ran away and she ran after him….and he is still running from her and she is still running after him all because he didn’t listen to the people who told him to be careful with such matters and he wasn’t. That is how the old man talked to Chay during his days of sheep herding, and Chay listened to many stories about such things over the summers of his youth.

Sitting there with this drunken woman, to those that were there, they could see that she was an easy pick up because that Indian guy just came over and bought her a couple of drinks and she got up and left with him.

Later that night, as he settled in….he could see her sleeping on the bed just a few feet away from him and he would drive her to Santa Clara in the morning and thought about the things he had learned in his youth and went out of the room and found a phone and called home….and Chays’ woman answered. She asked, is something wrong…

No, he said, I just wanted to hear the sound of your voice…and thought she is the mother of my children, a gift from Changing Woman, an Indian woman who waits for me….so it happened some time ago….

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